You might be a blogger...
Listen in on HTML Conversations!
Hear INTERNET FACTS!
Find Out if YOU are Pajamas Media Material!
Take the test!
You learned typing...
(a) Before World War II
(b) at home fooling with your siblings' notebook computer
(c) In seventh grade summer school
(d) typing up appeals to your felony morals conviction
You learned HTML coding...
(a) In a class
(b) on the job
(c) while in therapy
(d) from the aliens after the anal probe
Opinions arise in your brain...
(a) like mushrooms sprouting on a pile of manure
(b) like crocus blooms bursting through a late snow
(c) as rose petals falling gently from a cut bloom
(d) like poop from a backed up sewer
Spelling for you is...
(a) a constant challenge; you need a dictionary close by.
(b) an infrequent problem; you won a spelling bee as a kid.
(c) Thank God for splee chekcrs.
(d) who cairs? If there worried about spelling, read somthing else
When you try to write, grammar...
(a) should always be direct and uncomplicated.
(b) should define the most elegant expression.
(c) always is the servant of clear logic.
(d) gets you cookies and milk when you're sleepy.
People last chose you because of your ideas and opinions...
(a) when you ran for 7th grade class president
(b) when you pledged in college
(c) when you stood for city council
(d) when the other cell block prisoners needed a rep for hostage negotiations
The last time a Congressional representative quoted you...
(a) it was from your valedictory speech
(b) it was from your application for asylum
(c) it was from an editorial you wrote on pending legislation
(d) it was from the confession thrown out by the D.A.
The first time you critiqued the decisions of a judge...
(a) was in re: Plessy v. Ferguson
(b) was in 10th grade civics class
(c) was in your first year of law school
(d) the judge tacked an additional six months on your DUI sentence
When you offer your opinions in a public forum...
(a) you take pleasure in the ensuing conversation
(b) you are wary of debate and dispute
(c) authorities cite your ideas for sources, and run with them
(d) authorities cite you for contempt, and you run from them.
Your neighbors come to you...
(a) seeking wisdom and counsel
(b) seeking a good listener to sort out their own ideas
(c) seeking the power tools they loaned you last year
(d) seeking their farm animals you like to date
To set up a website...
(a) you paid a monthly fee to AOL
(b) you learned software and got a job with an ISP
(c) you drive around with a Wi-Fi seeker, and use other folks' internet access
(d) you funded your world-class internet porn network with drug money
The decline of traditional Mainstream Media...
(a) is long overdue, to your way of thinking
(b) underscores for you the urgency of evolving the blogosphere
(c) wouldn't remotely affect your alcohol consumption or bowling league
(d) will give you a free hand in the Balkans
When the local servers go down for more than a few hours...
(a) you notice a definite weight gain from compulsive noshing
(b) you have to work offline, but you can use "sneaker.net"
(c) your clients are on the phone constantly asking YOU to fix things
(d) you are able to emerge from your hidey hole without fear of detection by the "others" as long as you add an extra layer of foil to your beanie.
If you answered
Mostly A's - Good Reader, occasionally with a helpful comment to add
Mostly B's - Blogger Material but... well, keep your day job.
Mostly C's - PJM will probably already be having their lawyers draft an offer
Mostly D's - You are an escapee from Demokratischer Untergrund.
Hear INTERNET FACTS!
Find Out if YOU are Pajamas Media Material!
Take the test!
You learned typing...
(a) Before World War II
(b) at home fooling with your siblings' notebook computer
(c) In seventh grade summer school
(d) typing up appeals to your felony morals conviction
You learned HTML coding...
(a) In a class
(b) on the job
(c) while in therapy
(d) from the aliens after the anal probe
Opinions arise in your brain...
(a) like mushrooms sprouting on a pile of manure
(b) like crocus blooms bursting through a late snow
(c) as rose petals falling gently from a cut bloom
(d) like poop from a backed up sewer
Spelling for you is...
(a) a constant challenge; you need a dictionary close by.
(b) an infrequent problem; you won a spelling bee as a kid.
(c) Thank God for splee chekcrs.
(d) who cairs? If there worried about spelling, read somthing else
When you try to write, grammar...
(a) should always be direct and uncomplicated.
(b) should define the most elegant expression.
(c) always is the servant of clear logic.
(d) gets you cookies and milk when you're sleepy.
People last chose you because of your ideas and opinions...
(a) when you ran for 7th grade class president
(b) when you pledged in college
(c) when you stood for city council
(d) when the other cell block prisoners needed a rep for hostage negotiations
The last time a Congressional representative quoted you...
(a) it was from your valedictory speech
(b) it was from your application for asylum
(c) it was from an editorial you wrote on pending legislation
(d) it was from the confession thrown out by the D.A.
The first time you critiqued the decisions of a judge...
(a) was in re: Plessy v. Ferguson
(b) was in 10th grade civics class
(c) was in your first year of law school
(d) the judge tacked an additional six months on your DUI sentence
When you offer your opinions in a public forum...
(a) you take pleasure in the ensuing conversation
(b) you are wary of debate and dispute
(c) authorities cite your ideas for sources, and run with them
(d) authorities cite you for contempt, and you run from them.
Your neighbors come to you...
(a) seeking wisdom and counsel
(b) seeking a good listener to sort out their own ideas
(c) seeking the power tools they loaned you last year
(d) seeking their farm animals you like to date
To set up a website...
(a) you paid a monthly fee to AOL
(b) you learned software and got a job with an ISP
(c) you drive around with a Wi-Fi seeker, and use other folks' internet access
(d) you funded your world-class internet porn network with drug money
The decline of traditional Mainstream Media...
(a) is long overdue, to your way of thinking
(b) underscores for you the urgency of evolving the blogosphere
(c) wouldn't remotely affect your alcohol consumption or bowling league
(d) will give you a free hand in the Balkans
When the local servers go down for more than a few hours...
(a) you notice a definite weight gain from compulsive noshing
(b) you have to work offline, but you can use "sneaker.net"
(c) your clients are on the phone constantly asking YOU to fix things
(d) you are able to emerge from your hidey hole without fear of detection by the "others" as long as you add an extra layer of foil to your beanie.
If you answered
Mostly A's - Good Reader, occasionally with a helpful comment to add
Mostly B's - Blogger Material but... well, keep your day job.
Mostly C's - PJM will probably already be having their lawyers draft an offer
Mostly D's - You are an escapee from Demokratischer Untergrund.
posted by Mad Fiddler at 2:50 AM
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